Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A dumb thing that I do every day:

Take my contacts out before I locate my glasses.

This is a problem when your eyes can't see the countertop (or anything else) from a height of 5'6 3/4".

Another dumb thing I do every day: take my glasses off wherever I darn well please and leave them there, rendering them unfindable.

Life is so hard.

Sunday, October 17, 2010


Seth's deodorant is called Swagger.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010


To the people who eat the pears I helped can yesterday: I'm sorry if they're the worst canned pears you've ever had. I did not mean to suck at canning.

And to the people who run the cannery: I'm sorry if your machines are ruined. I did not mean to get those pears in those places.